Okay, so I guess I would have assumed I would have been smart enough based on the fact me and Tony had a detailed conversation about how we were bringing a spare pair of underwear around (and he even went one further as to have a plastic bag) just in case the Salt Water Flush decides to rear it's ugly bottom, but no.

Daimian Holiday Scott, everyone, is an idiot sometimes. Maybe always by accident, but doesn't it seem everything in life is kinda by accident.

Okay, a new tip for those males who are willing to take the challenge that is...the MasterCleanse -- sit-down while peeing.

The basis of the above conversion we were having revolved around how this weird thing happens sometimes when we are peeing where I guess the extra salt water comes out of your butt as well as you are flexing the same "toilet" muscle, and how it was kind of a strange sensation. Now add to this the fact that though one of my favorite things in the world is peeing in the outdoors when it is brisk, I tend to sit-down normally when I pee. I mostly do this for sanitary reasons because based on our wonderful laws of gravity as the liquid comes out of my penis and hits the water in the toilet bowl it splashes. Coming from Florida and wearing shorts I knew all too well that it tends to splash on your legs, as well as all around the toilet. Now if you are at a public restroom, or someone else's house (just kidding all of my friends who may be reading this!), then you just drop your pants and let loose. However, at my own house I would prefer to not have pee on my pants or pee on the floor. Today, though, I was at work which is generally somewhat akin to a "public" restroom.

Here I am ready to have this great release (as all you drink is liquid for 10 days, you tend to need to use the restroom at least 10 times a day to dispell toxins) and I start peeing and I realize that simultaneously some fluid is coming out the other end right onto my underwear. Fucking great! Now I am at work and have to clean the miniscule mess, but still I know where that miniscule comes from, up. I wind up wearing wet (but clean) underwear the rest of the day. I also wind up with a potential idea for the continuation of this blog.

Now I have no shame in the story because I know it really does happen to all of us at some point in our lives (if it hasn't happened yet, just you wait). So (wink, wink), why don't we continue the life of this blog by the whole world having a venue to share momentous poop stories and really make the tagline work "The Relaxative: A Blog about Poop"? Because, seriously, everyone has one of those times you did when you wish you didn't.

Poop abounds all around us! We as a culture are abundant in poop!

--daimian

Tony beat my Day 8 posting. Thanks alot, poopface!

Anyways, man is anyone ready for a hamburger. A nice big, juicy all-meat hamburger. Not me, I wouldn't touch the stuff. Actually, literally, having been vegetarian all my life I really think I would much rather never physically touch raw meat. I guess at this point it would almost seem canabilistic.

Day 8 was fun. Mellow. Relaxing. Poopderful!

--daimian

If you've been reading this and haven't yet posted a comment, how about now, friend? Just pick a post, click 'comments,' and show some love. We need your support. We're on Day 9, but we're looking down the barrel of the long four-day phase-out period. For nearly two days we get no lemonade -- only orange juice and grapefruit juice! Then there's a day of vegetable broth, then raw fruit and vegetables.

It's worth noting that of the many people I know and have contacted who have done the Master Cleanse, only about half have reached Day 10. And none has completed the phase-out period as written! No one's done it; everyone's had their reason for speeding things along. Perhaps this is where the emotional and psychological trial is at its toughest. I know I feel increased mental clarity and emotional presence today on Day 9, and it feels like we've made it, like we're done. But Burroughs and others write that the phase-out period is super important for a successful cleansing and a healthful return to normal eating.

We want all you out there to know that Team Relaxative is up to the challenge. But we're counting on your support. Let me hear it, Bay Area! Let me hear it, East Coast! Let me hear it, St. Louis! Let me hear it, Guatemala! Feel the love. Show the love.

--tony